Discover Your Child-Sexuality
For a more detailed table, see our Thematic Index; the navigation bar on your left. Child's sexuality Table 5: The 5 stages of psycho-sexual development according to Sigmund Freud
Boyhood sexuality is a vital topic. It is an important key to his / her success and happiness. Childhood is the period of life that lies between birth and adolescence, between 0 and 15 years. This period is divided as follows: newborn or neonate (0 to 3 weeks); toddler, infant, babe in arms (3 weeks to 2 years); child, preschooler (from 2 years to 7 years); older child, school age (7 years to 15 years). We will see how important child-sexuality is. Children and sexuality is a very common theme that should be explored by all those who care about the success and happiness of their child. We provide you with proven knowledge and efficient advices that will help you take care of your child’s sexuality in a proper way. Sex life begins at infancy. That sex life is organized in stages around erogenous zones (areas of the body that can provide pleasure). * For a newborn and young toddler (0 to 2 years), the mouth is a source of satisfaction (pleasure of biting and sucking); it is the oral stage of child-sexuality. * Then for a child (2 to 7 years) who is learning cleanliness, the anal area becomes dominant (pleasure to hold and expel faeces, he / she may play with feces); it is the anal stage. * Finally, for older child (7 to 15 years), genitals become the source of pleasure (possible masturbation); it is the phallic stage of child-sexuality. The manifestation of child’s sexuality is polymorph. This sexuality includes diverse sexual conducts (masturbation, voyeurism, sex games…). With the resolution of the Oedipus complex, around 3 to 5 years age, the foundations and structure (sexual, behavior, etc.) of the personality of that future adult is completed. Regarding children sexuality, it is recommended that parents (biological or adoptive); educators; private institutions; public institutions (government); schools, media, etc., give proper sexual education to children, adolescents, adults and elders. If basic knowledge about sexual education are lacking for parents, educators, institutions, schools, media and, etc, then the help of a health professional (pedo-psychologist, sexologist, psychologist, psychoanalyst, etc.) should be considered; the sooner the better. Regarding child-sexuality, parents or educator should be physically emotionally healthy; in order to help children. See the web page: Health The sexuality of children is an important part of child’s education. We want to give this wise advice to parents and educators: "Child-sexuality is to be taken very seriously. For the fulfillment of that sexuality will determine the physical, psychological and emotional balance of the adolescent, adult and elder that he/she will become. And this balance will also determine their financial well-being and human-relations harmony. In simple terms, their success and happiness will be determined by that balance; just as success and happiness of those around them." To ignore this reality, or neglect to apply the principles we suggest here, could be disastrous; because, mediocre sexual education could cause an emotional blockage and emotional deficiency; sexual blockage may appear; sexual frigidity and impotence may appear; many other sexual and emotional miseries may appear; psychological castration, psychological impotence may appear; incapable to succeed socially, that person may accumulate failures. Children sexuality should be taken very seriously. Many women and men have missed their life, because parents and educators have ignored or neglected (which is the same) the truths we tell you now. You see all the importance of child-sexuality. But the sexuality of parents or educators may influence the sexuality of children. In other words, parents or educators should optimize their sexuality in order to better educate and help kids. Explore these helpful suggestions: Penis enlargement, stronger erections and intense stamina Libido For Her. Increase women’s sex drive. Kama Rani - 5,000 Year Old Formula for Female Arousal! For men: Increase your sexual desire and sexual performances.
Child-sexuality and psycho-sexual development
NB: Beside child-sexuality, this table is also a summary of developmental models according to Sigmund Freud, Jean Piaget and Erik Erikson. Note that this table is linked to sexuality study. This table helps understand the sexuality of children.
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According to Kaplan and O'Connor (1993), studies in gerontology have uncovered another stage of life among the very elderly, that of continuity of self to future generations through the (trans-generational continuity). They also add two other stages, well before the birth, taking into account the development of human beings at the moment of conception and during its development in the womb of its mother. This implies that human being comes into existence at the moment of the fertilization of an egg. Obviously, such a design is contested by movements in favor of abortion (pro choice). Source: Based on Erikson (1963); Freud (1953) and Piaget (1967). From the book of Estelle M. Morin (1996) Psychology at work, Gaëtan Morin Editor, p.46-47. The following show the link between children and sexuality. The sexuality of children is well explained. Child-sexuality: Psycho-sexual development of children from 0 to 2 years The child is very close to his parents, physically and psychologically; as a result, his entire body and mind come in contact with them. These contacts (touches, caresses, kissing, games, tender conversations, etc.) are very important for the psycho-affective development of this creature. For a child who does not receive affection and love, may not be able to give affection and love in the future. He/she might become an adult who refuses to receive affection; he/she may not love or accept to be loved... Gradually, the boy separates himself from the psychological image of the mother... To this end, he may focus on a favorite object (toy) that symbolizes his mother (the mother). He begins indeed to identify himself; to individualize himself. In the same way, the girl separated herself from the psychological image of her father (the father)... The oral stage during child-sexuality. During the oral period, mouth, lips and tongue are important erogenous zones. With these lips, mouth and tongue children will explore the world around them; and thus experience pleasure. The pleasure of sucking the mother's breast, the nipple of a bottle, a baby’s dummy, a lollipop, his finger, his toe, his toy, etc. Their mouth is a source of pleasant sensations. Children will also bite to discover and test, themselves, but also for pleasure. These pleasant sensations are already a prelude to their libido (sexual pleasure, sexual energy, love in the widest sense). It is a prelude of child-sexuality. It is important children do not stay fixed to the oral stage, because the consequences could hinder their personal development, and also their sexuality (see Table 5, above). As a result of an emotional shock, adolescents and adults may psychologically regress (return) to oral stage. Child-sexuality: Psycho-sexual development of children ages 2 to 4 Anal stage during child-sexuality. During this crucial period of children sexuality, the child begins to learn cleanliness. The child learns to control his/her sphincter muscle. Hence, he/she learns self-control; which is important for human and interpersonal relations (because these children learn to contain themselves, to let go, to oppose or to submit, to give pleasure to themselves or to others). This anal area becomes the area of pleasant sensations. Here, the erogenous zone is the anus. These children have pleasure to retain their stool or to evacuate. This game of tension and relaxation give them pleasure. This pleasure during child-sexuality also structures their libido (sexual pleasure, sexual energy, love in the widest sense). At this anal period, children may play with their excrement. As later they will play with mud, clay, or play the game of sand. It is in the anal stage that children explore their body in search of sensual pleasures. Erections and lubrication appear. Masturbation may take place. I t is a part of child sexuality. The emergence of language enables them to differentiate themselves sexually and differentiate others people. It is important that a child does not stay fixed to the anal stage, because the consequences could hinder their personal development, and his/her sexuality (see Table 5, above). A child who stay fixed (stops) at the oral stage, may have a mediocre emotional, sexual and social development; hence the importance of a proper sexual education and practical knowledge regarding child-sexuality. As a result of a shock, adolescents or adults may psychologically regress (return) to anal stage. Child-sexuality: Psycho-sexual development of children 4 to 6 years Phallic stage. Phantasms, imagination and various fears are preoccupations of that child; because he has acquired concrete thinking (concrete operational thinking). Reality is distinguished from imagination. The concept of symbols is acquired, allowing them to play games of roles (playing the doctor, playing the nurse, playing mom or dad, etc.) At the phallic stage, genitalia are erogenous zones. The child wants to assert his/her own gender. Masturbation may happen occasionally. At the phallic period of children sexuality, this being likes to be naked (exhibitionism) and see naked people (voyeurism). There is a desire to touch the breast and penis of parents; as the desire to engage in sexual games. The phallic stage is also called Oedipian stage. The child wants to get closer to the parent of the opposite sex. A rivalry is established between the child and the parent of the same sex. Above, we have talked about the Oedipus complex. We have said: "According to psychoanalytic theory, the Oedipus complex is the most important complex regarding child-sexuality. It is a normal phenomenon that occurs during child-sexuality, in children between 3 and 5 years on average. The Oedipus complex consists of a set of feelings, experienced by a child regarding his/her parents. The girl loves her father, an exclusive love, while she opposes her mother and jealous her. The boy manifests an exclusive love for his mother, but manifests hostility and jealousy against his father." For more details on Oedipus complex, see: Emotional Health (feelings, emotions, sentiments) But all serious psychoanalysts roughly agree that the reality of the Oedipus complex is not simple. Because the child also feels positive feelings toward the parent of the same sex, as admiration and desire to look like that parent of the same sex. To overcome this psychological conflict, the child should be able to identify with this parent of the same sex. This is usually well resolved when child-sexuality is well understood. If the Oedipus complex is not resolved, it remains repressed into the subconscious and generates neuroses. These neurotic disorders may be generated both in children and adults. The resolution of the Oedipus complex must be done with the wise assistance of parents and educators. At our page: Health, read the whole section: Overcoming sentiments of inferiority (complex of inferiority); see the web page: Emotional Health (feelings, emotions, sentiments). Let’s just add that the Oedipus complex, unresolved, could jeopardize the future sexuality of a child. That is why children and sexuality should be taken very seriously. It is important that a child does not stay fixed to the anal stage, because the consequences could hinder his/her personal development, and his / her sexuality (see Table 5, above). As a result of an emotional shock, adolescents and adults may psychologically regress (return) to the anal stage. Child-sexuality: Psycho-sexual development of children 6 to 12 Latency stage. The latency period, allows children to attend school. Prohibitions and social conventions will continue to shape their behavior. The child begins to develop defense mechanisms (psychological defense mechanisms). Privacy and modesty compose his/her psychology. Nudity may embarrass them. These beings have tendency to feel more comfortable with children of the same sex. If the Oedipus complex is resolved, relations with the parent of the same sex will be harmonious; as their human relations (interpersonal relations). At this latency period, there is no particular erogenous zone. However, during this stage, occasional masturbation is possible. The child is aware of his sexual identity. He/she may still play role games (playing the doctor or playing the nurse, playing mom and dad, etc.). Masturbation should stop during adulthood; but it is possible to have sexual support in order to optimize child-sexuality. Secondary sexual characteristics appear (pubic hair, menstruation, tone of voice, etc.); this may hinder or render them proud. These pre-adolescents, have a greater awareness of their sexual orientation and sexual identity. These children are sensitive to the comments of others, which affects their self-image. Their sexual sensations intensify. These creatures are actively seeking information about sexuality. Their fantasies increase. This gives rise to occasional touchings on their body (masturbation) or on the body of the opposite sex (kissing, etc.). That is why it is crucial to be well informed regarding the sexuality of children. Contrary to oral, anal, phallic and genital stage, fixation does not occur during the latency period. Child-sexuality: Psycho-sexual development of children 12 and more Genital stage. This is the last psycho-sexual stage defined by Freud. The genital period appears during adolescence. Sexual impulsions "slept" during the latency stage, is awoken as a result of physiological changes. These new sexual impulses are directed to the opposite sex. The main psycho-sexual purpose of this stage is the opening to adult sexuality (Cloutier and Renaud, 1990). During the genital phase of child-sexuality, erogenous zones (zones of pleasure) are the genitalia, just as it was at the phallic stage. The maturity of sexual intimacy is at the heart of the genital stage. This maturity will influence the health of the body, soul, mind (mental, intelligence); the development of emotions, financial balance and harmony in interpersonal relations. In simple terms, these children’s success and happiness will also be influenced by this genital period. Regarding children sexuality, it is important that children do not stay fixed to the genital stage, because the consequences could hinder their personal development, and also his/her sexuality (see Table 5, above). A child, who stays fixed (stops) at the genital stage, may have a mediocre sexual and social development; hence the importance of a proper sexual education. As a result of an emotional shock, adolescents and adults may psychologically regress (return) to genital stage. You see how important child-sexuality is. Children and sexuality is a very important topic; indeed. It is important for parents or educator to be emotionally and physically healthy; in order to help the children. See the web page: Health Health of the mind (mental, intellectual) Emotional Health (feelings, emotions, sentiments)
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